Transcript

Maria Felipe:                        00:02                       Hi everyone and welcome to Live Your Happy TV. I am so excited to be joining you today with an amazing course in miracles teacher. You guys are in for a treat big time and I mean that big time. She’s actually one of the elders. She is from back in the day, way back. She’s been teaching for over 40 years. She actually has taught with Kenneth Wapnick. She knows Judy Scutch. She’s, she’s an elder. Not only that, she has traveled all over the place speaking about the course of miracles. She has this amazing DVD set that we’re going to talk about today that makes the course of miracles nice and simple. She, um, she has shared the podium with an amazing teacher as well, built effort. Also Jerry Jampolsky. She’s written books, healing the hurt behind addictions and compulsive behaviors. She’s also written the book home ward to an open door exploring, exploring major principles of a course in miracles. She has over, as I said earlier, 40 years or more of studying the course and of course us students and teachers really appreciate her and her work. Um, she is, she has so much juicy details. She was a happy teacher. That’s why I wanted to have her on. You’ll see that she is just filled with joy and happiness and I’m going to pick her brain today because I just had a little one that was born at less than two months ago and I’m losing my mind so I am ready to come back.

Maria Felipe:                        01:42                       Carol, thank you for, for being with us today.

Carol Howe:                          01:45                       Oh, you are so, so welcome. It’s like if there’s not anything in the world, more fun as far as I concerned that I realized some people could find this strange, but being involved with talking about this material, leading people through it, doing counseling that relates to making it practical. I find it delicious and people would go what like, but I find that to be the most rewarding thing in the world and so I will continue until I dropped dead for awhile.

Maria Felipe:                        02:19                       I love that. Yeah. And I can see. I can see that your purpose, you’re shining so brightly. I can, I could see how much you enjoy this and you can tell. You can tell that you’re living it and I think that’s so important. Um, being a teacher as well and working with you and also following you has been very inspiring. That’s why I wrote live your happy because I wanted to write a book that’s living the course of miracles is living. You’re happy and I feel that that’s what you’re doing.

Carol Howe:                          02:46                       Yes. And you know, in the facebook live session that I did last night, I’ve done that, I don’t know, seven or eight up and it’s fun. And I said, you know, universe, how I was sent to sell something that nobody wants, which is peace of mind. You know, the ego says we want excitement, we want stimulation, we want whatever, and you think he’s of mind is boring. Who wants that? So our job as far as I’m concerned is to say, peace of mind is so not boring. It’s not like you’re sitting around doing nothing. It’s this wonderful sense of things are fun. You feel safe and feel included and, and much, much, much even better than that. When you get into the nonverbal experience, which is so beyond words, the the experience of silence in your mind is just beyond description, so I feel like part of our mission is to say peace of mind, which is the goal of a course in miracles is really worth pursuing. Don’t let your ego mind says no, no, no, that sounds boring. You should know by this time your ego mind. It gives you terrible advice.

Maria Felipe:                        04:04                       Don’t pay attention to it. I always say, how am I supposed to be a popular teacher if I teach that abundance is within you that you can’t find it outside of you, so you know because it’s beautiful. It’s actually the opposite of what’s out there and talking about that, how, how has. Let’s get right into it. How has the a course in miracles community and the message changed throughout the years because you’ve been around for awhile and I want to just be really honest in this interview. I want to expose everything. I feel that it has changed in a lot of people have gotten a little bit confused and have been using it for manifesting and creating stuff informed. What do you have to say about that? I would say that is so completely not what it’s about. It’s about,

Carol Howe:                          04:54                       you know, there’s a phrase in the Bible that says, seek ye first the Kingdom of Heaven and all else will be added unto you. It doesn’t say both for all the added unto you stuff and then something else might happen. In other words,

Maria Felipe:                        05:07                       if the reason why

Carol Howe:                          05:11                       people miss the point so is that we’re operating out of an incorrect premise about how life really is and here’s the major misunderstanding and that is people know something about what our thoughts pause our reality or our thoughts cause our outer life. That implies something happens and then something else happens. The part that’s not correct about that is our outer world. That means the things we perceive, the things we see, the things you know, the experiences we get into, what we could touch, what can smell, but we can hear

Maria Felipe:                        05:51                       are not

Carol Howe:                          05:52                       a result of our thoughts. They are our thoughts in form. They are one what we think of as invisible thoughts and what we think of as our outside world. It’s not that they’re identical, they are one. They are to shall we say expressions of one thing and the idea of trying to do some sort of magic in your mind and make your outer world be different. Hopefully more abundant and the case that you’re you’ve just used is impossible as long as you have self hatred, as long as you feel like somewhere under there, you don’t want people to know who you are, that you’re unworthy and all kinds of beliefs that we brought with us from our pre verbal days or for a lot of people we don’t even know they’re there and the fact that they’re unconscious doesn’t mean they aren’t still driving the bus.

Carol Howe:                          06:53                       So the idea that we can have an outside so called outside world that is in any way divergent from our inside state of mind is a hopeless, meaningless past. It’s impossible to do. It’s it. It’s, it’s, it’s no more possible than my very favorite example which you’re standing in front of a mirror. If you stand in front of a mirror with your nice black dress on and you look in the mirror and you say, I don’t like that black dress in there, I just require that you have on a green shirt. It’s like, well, how successful will you be? You can pray, you can threaten, you can do all kinds of things and nothing in that mirror is going to change until you change your clothes. Now another important thing about that mirror is the mirror doesn’t still images. It never occurs to you. When you stand in front of your mirror, when you got dressed with whenever you got dressed, it didn’t.

Carol Howe:                          07:55                       You didn’t sneak up on the mirror like, I dunno what’s gonna, be in there or maybe there’s maybe yesterday’s image will be there. No Way. You’re absolutely confident when you stand in front of a mirror, it’s going to show you what you look like at that moment and our world is always going to show us or represent us. What we believe, doesn’t matter. If you believe something, you think you’re hiding it, there’s no hiding it. Your world shows up as your thought process. What do you find? So it shows you basically what needs to be healed as well. Yes, absolutely. So if there appears to be lack, if there appears to be in harmony, if there appears to be difficulty, then what the course tells us is this is a trigger. This is a mirror. This is I call the world of like a great big diagnostic.

Carol Howe:                          08:54                       You know how you stick a body in an Mri to say what’s going on in that body, your outside world. Again, we must put that in quotes is like a great big diagnostic that says, here are the nature of your thoughts. Do you like that? So to try to change an outside form without first looking to see how we’re hurting ourselves by listening to the advice and counsel of that ego mind is hopeless. You can’t do it. It’s an impossibility. It’s like demanding that an image in the mirror change, it’s never going to happen. So,

Maria Felipe:                        09:35                       and how does that relate to what the world will call manifesting manifestation, the secret, stuff like that?

Carol Howe:                          09:43                       Well, what’s missing is this understanding that I am always manifesting, if you will. I mean obviously my world is my manifestation of my state of mind, not my wishlist. You know, if it’s a manifestation of what I actually believe at that second, because everything is experienced in the moment. Now, if I have a radical change of mind, you know, like if I suddenly realized, Oh, I’ve been putting myself down all my life and there’s really no reason for it. In other words, if we begin to change our minds, then you don’t have to worry about how do I manifest? It’s automatically going to change. You don’t have to instruct the image in the mirror when you, when you looked in the mirror today, when you change your clothes, you didn’t have to say, listen, mirror, I need to explain to you that you need to show up as a black dress. It does it automatically.

Maria Felipe:                        10:42                       Wow. That’s so powerful. You know, it’s, it’s interesting because back in the day when I was in my early twenties, I was going through a little, well basically a depression and I had, you know, I had it all like the physical world. I had a TV or whatnot and I remember that I was in one of the worst states of mind and at the same time in my external world, I was creating all this like amazingness, but I couldn’t perceive it. I couldn’t, I couldn’t experience it that way. So as a national show, I had a French boyfriend, I had the money in the bank, but even though that was happening, I couldn’t. How do I explain it? I couldn’t experience it as, as abundance as, as

Carol Howe:                          11:29                       so. And that’s why it’s impossible. It’s impossible to divorce what’s happening in the world of form and what’s happening in your state of mind, which is why, you know, if you go back to that very simple little prayer that’s at the beginning of the course that was for built that for the one that says, I’m here only to truly helpful. Remember that, you know, it’s very early. So the second chapter someplace, and in any event, you know the history of that is interesting because bill was required, required. He was invited in the medical center medium, go deliver a presentation to a big group someplace and it was not quite his area of expertise. It was close to it, but not quite. So he didn’t want to do this anymore than he wanted to fly out the window. He didn’t even like to talk to big groups anyway.

Carol Howe:                          12:26                       And so he was very concerned about embarrassing himself not knowing what he was doing or something like that. So Helen picked up, you know, God for him this little prayer that said, Bill, here’s the deal. Rather than worrying about whether you’re smart enough and know all the right material enough, keep this in mind and say to yourself, I am here at this meeting only to be truly helpful. So it doesn’t matter about what I say or what I do because he who arranged this meeting, you know, he who sent me is going to direct me, you know. So I think that is so applicable to all of us is like I’m here only to be truly helpful. Those two key words only it doesn’t say I’m here to be helpful sometimes when it’s okay with me to do that and the rest of the time I don’t care if I’m helpful or not or maybe I especially don’t want to be helpful.

Carol Howe:                          13:29                       It’s like, well that that will not work out well in terms of how you’re our world shows up. And then that other key word is so that truly helpful and only helpful, so truly helpful is following your intuition. It’s following that loving kind of guidance. It’s not explaining to other people how they ought to be different. That’s not helpful. You know, there’s a lot of so called fake healthfulness like I’m going to tell you how you would be much better off. You know, I’ve got your answers kind of thing. So you know, if we stuck with something that was that elementary and just thought everywhere I go am I focused on being truly helpful both to others and to myself. We cannot leave ourselves out because I’ve done so much counseling over the years and so many times people will complain and complain about all the things they have to do and I’ll say, did you put yourself on the list of the people you need to do for and care for and be there for?

Carol Howe:                          14:36                       It’s like, no, or I’m at the bottom of the list. Well, it’s like that tells you a great deal. That tells you a lot about how that person is not honoring himself or herself not being only truly helpful to him Sir himself or herself, so this isn’t really rocket science can really, if you’re interested in find out pretty quickly those places where you’ve listened to your ego mind and you decided you wanted deserving, you don’t want anybody to see. Remember, there’s a lesson that starts out. You believe that if people who could see who really are, they would run from you as if from a poisonous snake. That’s a pretty big statement of course is known for its pretty big radical statements, but I’ve met so many people and they’re not even all core sticks. You know, people have done counseling with over the years, much less than classes and every place else is that quiet is the hallmark of human beings is a mix of the things we believe about ourselves and too much of what we believe about ourselves.

Carol Howe:                          15:51                       We don’t think of it as a belief. We think it’s the truth about ourselves is that we are in some way inadequate, not okay, don’t measure up, etc. Etc. And thE purpose of the course, I call it a spiritual technologies since everybody’s in a lot the technology, great, let’s call this a technology. It’s like for rewiring our brains so that steadily through doing that drumbeat of the practice of the lessons, you are literally creating new neural networks. We obviously hAve to talk as if we are human beings on the planet. We can’t go right to. That’s not what we are, where you can’t jump from a to z. That’s a process to get more deeply into our true. So we have to start where we think we are not really actually are. Does that make sense?

Maria Felipe:                        16:47                       It makes a lot of sense, especially, you know, because it’s, for what I’m hearing is basically undoing the ego and I feel that it’s a gentle process, a gradual process. It’s not a onetime event. It’s a process started to distinguish what the real and the unreal and I and it is. I feel that people want to get, you know, like you said, from a to z so quickly and you know, that’s why the holy spirit, I feel so gentle with us and actually even knows what we need. It’s so funny because recently with having the baby, I, I, I, like you said earlier, I don’t know if everybody heard, but carol also has two boys and she says, the first three months it was all a fog. That’s how I felt. My first month. Everything was such a fog and I, I sat, I sat down with holy spirit and I was so tired and I was giving holy spirit over all my thoughts and just doing this process. And I remember holy spirit saying, don’t, don’t say anything else. I know exactly what you need and you’re tired. You’re already tired. I know exactly what you need. I feel like, you know, spirit just, just knows, um, you know, it’s so beautiful and it’s always there for us to hold our hand and to guide us towards, back to god. And I feel at the end is, it’s god’s will. And um, I think unfortunately we want our will not god’s will. Absolutely.

Carol Howe:                          18:09                       You should. As you get older and older and older, hopefully you realized, you know, what, this egos advice and counsel is terrible. When am I going to go? What’s the big idea and why am I listening?

Maria Felipe:                        18:29                       I said that the ego is, um, talks a lot of cat guy, which is shit. Yeah, absolutely.

Carol Howe:                          18:35                       Absolutely. And it, you see, nobody escapes from needing to heal woundedness because even at the world of time and space level where we appear to be. So we have to, we have to make a concession where we think we are. We inherit guilt and fear through our dna, through our ancestral lines. So from the moment of conception, we take on woundedness. So there’s not like, there are some people who have wounds to heal and others who don’t. Every single person, I like to think of it as there’s really no such thing as individual karma because there’s really no such thing as an individual, so you might say, well, we each have is our own slice of the karmic pi to heal on behalf of everyone. Now, don’t ask me how we get a signed our pie. That’s kind of irrelevant. What happens is we each come with our own fear and our own guilt, which is going to show up as unfortunate or difficult or are unhappy circumstances in our lives and it’s our job as quickly as possible to begin to put two and two together properly to begin to connect the dots in some way and the courses brilliant at doing that of helping us see, okay, and that’s.

Carol Howe:                          20:12                       And that’s why of all the teachings of nonduality and there are. they’ve been around for thousands of years. The course is unique in focusing on relationships as iron fast track to first discovering what we’re doing to ourselves, discovering what that woundedness is and then what to do about it

Maria Felipe:                        20:36                       would agree. Relationships. There’s a book that I read right when I became pregnant and it was 10 at hopkins, will have you heard of it, um, to uh, it’s called parents and children are most difficult classroom.

Carol Howe:                          20:51                       No, but they certainly are having little kids was without a doubt the most difficult time of my life, you know, because I was very successful until my kids were born because I deal with rational adults. So that’s like nobody in my generation or my parent’s generation knew anything about early childhood development. Nobody knew really about the cycles that chIldren go through. And so most parents, even today, most parents are kind of clueless about how to respond, but what I realized was having irrational ones, you babies and little kids around triggered stuffi need that adults just didn’t trigger. so you might say for me, babies and little kids was a major spiritual practice and I got in touch with distressed that I had no idea I was carrying around with me. It was the best thing that ever happened. It’s also a best thing that ever happens that your kids grow up in the general climate, shall we say, of the course of miracles because my kids are middle aged now at this point and they were five and seven when I started doing the course or actually a little bit younger than that and I never forced it on them.

Carol Howe:                          22:18                       I thought everybody’s got their own spiritual path. They might decide to be buddhists for all I know rather than, but they grew up in the climate, shall we say, of a course in miracles. It very well. The best thing you can do for your kids is get your own act together.

Maria Felipe:                        22:37                       I agree and I love that you say that. Cause I, I have been going through some challenges ever since our little one was born to be able to balance career and I’m able to balance. I’m just in my life in general, so I always say that ever since my baby was born, it’s been like a spray, like a spiritual olympics. You know? I am so beyond grateful even though, you know, I get sad. I could even cry right now. I get sad, my hormones are out of whack, all these things are going on, but at the same time I’m so grateful because he’s bringing out so much in me. So much love. I’m growing so much. It’s like it’s like taking me to the next level and it’s absolutely hard, but at the same time I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. absolutely no artist ever.

Carol Howe:                          23:28                       I remember one time when my kids were very little before they went to school, I looked at them one day and I thought I can see myself exactly split into. I’m exactly like this one and I’m exactly like this one. You know, there are no accidents that we end up with the kids we end up with and you see if all of us knew how. I wish I had known this in my early days because I kind of was never much ever upset. I mean, up until the time I had kids, wife was pretty much always highly successful. What can I say? There was, you know, an occasional little heartbreak here or there, but basically life was good as far as I was going to do the same and the and the thing is is that the circumstances will come along and for many people it’s having kids.

Carol Howe:                          24:18                       It’s that’s not true for everybody and what that circumstance does is drive up into your awareness some upset, some, so some things that we believe and so on that otherwise we would never be able to access and if you cannot access them and if you don’t know they’re there, you cannot take the steps to heal them. That’s why our relationships, whether it’s with our babies, our neighbors, our spouses, some other country, it doesn’t matter what you’re relating with. It’s why whenever distress accompanied, shall we say, a relationship, it’s because that person or situation is triggering. It’s kind of like whatever defenses we may have up that person’s, we’ll call it their behavior, their energy field or whatever gets behind our defenses and pushes that button. We what the course will keep telling us over and over and over again is another person does not cause your upset.

Carol Howe:                          25:27                       Another person Will be such a match to what you feel guilty about, what you have buried in your unconscious, that, that it’s, it’s going to be this, you might say in the beginning like the match made in hell, and I don’t mean just your partners. I mean you know somebody would have to deal with like once in your life and it’s an upsetting experience. The upset is because my guilt, my unfinished business is being brought into my conscious awareness by this other triggering person or event. If we can get over the idea that other people cause are upset, they do not cause it. They trigger it. We, we are in a relationship and it’s bringing this up. That is the most important distinction you will ever make. Other people do not cause you’re upset. They trigger your own guilt, your own upset that you got often shoved down there and your unconscious mind where it’s wrecking your life, causing that lack of abundance and you know it’s there doing its damage until you find a situation like this, you know, so the, let’s just call it, if some distress is coming up. Now, when this news circumstance of your life, it’s like you go, thank you god. This distress is just really not a baby and it’s really not about work. it’s bringing into my awareness something I believe that’s short circuiting that here I need to take a look at this. Change my mind.

Maria Felipe:                        27:14                       Yeah. I’ve noticed. I’ve noticed how this amazing new experience in my life, how, how easy it is to go into victimization, how easy it is to go into not being responsible help. It’s just amazing. I’m like, oh my god, it’s gone to shit and just somehoW second and it’s. And then I get the free. The thing is, is that I’m not so aware of it, which is beautiful because I get and I also have a very conscious partner, christian that also studies, so it’s beautiful to be able to have these really deep conversations that heal together and to see how we still want to put our guilt on each other. Um, you know, I did This for you and I did that for you. I cooked for you or I cook for you or I put the baby to sleep. It’s all this guilt ridden.

Maria Felipe:                        28:03                       It’s like my house is right now, of course in miracles on fire because we are going deep and deep is like bring it. I say christian, let’s say bring the healing like I would because I feel that I feel, I feel like I’m finally living, you know, and, and now this is what matters. You know, before it’s easy to practice the tools. When life is practice, when nobody’s bothering you, have like a bed screaming, you know, for a long time or you, you know, you have your, your partner, you’re thinking he’s doing something to you. That’s what. It’s hard to practice. So I am so grateful and within the challenge because it is challenging and I’m very honest about that. Within the challenge I can see the beauty and that’s what’s so beautiful because I keep on remembering constantly. I’ve never left the mind of god and the whatever image I’m seeing is just taking away my piece. It’s just trying to take away my peace of god, which is my inheritance. Which

Carol Howe:                          29:04                       you know, since since your, since your lessons for the next few years anyway, are going to be intimately involved with your children and there’s going to be many phases of that when as part of this big, having little kids as a spiritual practice thing. Here’s an interesting story I’m going to pass onto you. I think I’ve written about this but it’s very important to hear. We had a next door neighbor neighbors and the older sister in this family was our primary babysitter and there was a little brother in the family who was about five years older than my older son at the time and he used to be at our house all the time and I didn’t like this boy. I wouldn’t been able to exactly tell you what I didn’t like about him, but I didn’t like it because when they would start to play he was enough older, enough, bigger.

Carol Howe:                          30:00                       Somebody would end up getting encouraged. Somebody would end up crying and always just felt like bedlam when he was around. So I thought, I so don’t like this kid. And so I wasn’t mean to him, but I would tell him to go home and that there was a six foot fence between their backyard in iris, so I’d run him out the front door and I’d look at their using the backyard and he’d crawl over the fence and they would be back in my yard again. It was like, I can’t get this. Talked to his mother who was very patient with me, you know, about this situation. And one day I thought, what is it that I object to about this kid might let’s say if my boys were baby two and four and possibly he was nine or something like that. And I thought he’s too hard on my kids.

Carol Howe:                          30:54                       And other words. That was the phrase that came to mind. I went bingo. I feel guilty about being too hard on my kids. Not wrestling around on the floor with them, but I felt like maybe my expectations are too high. Maybe it’s just I’m hard on because on the one I’m doing or something like that. But then when you see the phrase that I use to describe what I didn’t like about him was the key to finding that guilt within myself. And once I really recognized, I think I was sort of aware of it, but this consolidated my understanding of this and I thought, you know what, obviously I make a lot of mistakes as a, as a mother, but I am doing everything I know how to do. I’m, I’m, there’s nobody who wants any more than I do to be the right kind of mother for my kids.

Carol Howe:                          31:54                       And I started being nice to me and it’s like, yes, I’ve made all sorts of mistakes, but. But my intention is to love and care for my boys and do the very best I can for them. And with that realization that I was the one who was hurting myself by feeling guilty about that, I want you to know instantly hank was gone. He just never showed up anymore. After all of those times, I ran him out and didn’t want him to be there anymore. He was gone because my guilt was gone. He was playing out my guilt. I let go of my guilt. I would sometimes go for two months and not ever seen. He just suddenly had other places to go other people to play with. That’s the way it works folks. It can change that dramatically. Wow. Wow. The situations to be the pointer that they are to where you are still undermining your own peace of mind by feeling guilty, by feeling not worthy.

Carol Howe:                          33:03                       I feeling like you can’t let anybody know who you are. That Sort of thing. It’s like, don’t forget your. Your so called inner thoughts and your outer circumstances are identical. They are the same thing. As long as I let go of that particular guilt, there’s no possibility of it being manifest in my outer life. In fact, as his older sister got older and went off to college, we occasionally had him come over and babysit. our kids weren’t quite old enough to be left alone when we had to go someplace and that’s a miracle there. It happens all the time. That way I can’t tell you the number of clients that I’ll get an email from an they’ll go, you’ll never guess what happened after they had some great difficulty with, you know, a family member or whatever it is, whoever just they have trouble with and they really let go of what they’re doing with themselves and then all of a sudden out of nowhere this person shows up.

Carol Howe:                          34:07                       They’re kind, they’re appropriate, they’re nice, and they go, what happened? It’s like what happened is you let go of your own as you let go of some of your own self condemnation and your world automatically cannot reflect it that way. And I have a question in regards to what everyone. If you’re just tuning in, I’m speaking to carol, how we’re talking about a course in miracles, which is my favorite book and spiritual practice and I wanted to go ahead and ask you carol, what is your favorite workbook lesson? Oh my gosh. I couldn’t possibly have a favorite part of workbook lesson like especially since I had just recorded all 365 of them with commentary. I Decided at the end of 20, this is 2018, I decided the last week of december of 2016. It was like the intuition go goes, you need to record the lessons. I go, you’ve got to be kidding with everything else on my plate.

Carol Howe:                          35:15                       That’s hundreds of hours of recording because you didn’t. I mean, it takes a while to decide what needs to be added and what commentary needs to be done. It has to be recorded, has to be edited. It has to be uploaded. It’s like hundreds and hundreds of. I thought, when am I going to spend hundreds of hours of this? It was like record the just like, okay, and so I did and it was several hundred hours worth, but it was very clear that it needed to happen and I’ve gotten that because of that. I’m in love with all of them. I’m so invested in all of them and I have gotten so much feedback from people who are doing those lessons that clearly we’ll call it intuition, guidance. Spirit knew what they were doing and I said, listen, if I do less than number one, I’m committed all the way through lesson six, 365. I can’t stop in april and say I’m too busy to go on so that it was very clear like, these lessons need to be recorded. I have learned to listen even if I don’t know why or how things are going to turn out. When my intuition slash guidance slash holy spirit speaks, I listen.

Maria Felipe:                        36:37                       Yeah, and it starts to get a lot, I think more loving and happier because you start to trust them. You get out of the way of trying to control, manipulate, make things happen and allow. I like to say instead of it, if you’re doing it, you let it allow you, allow it to be done through you.

Carol Howe:                          36:57                       Yes. You allow it to be done through you and you don’t want. You’re not only happier, you’re a lot safer. I will tell you a really fast little story. I think I did this on something not long ago, not long ago. I was driving home on a very busy street, three lanes of traffic both ways, stopped at a light. There’s a guy in a truck ahead of me and he’s got it looks like appliances in the back of his truck and it’s so full that the, that the tailgate is down and he’s got it all tied up across the back. Mostly I was aware of how furious this guy was. It’s almost like you could see smoke coming out of his truck. Not real smoke, but like anger coming out of his truck and I could see looking in his rear view mirror and he just had the fear area scowl on hIs face.

Carol Howe:                          37:41                       Okay, so the light changes and we start. This is a very, very busy street. There’s no way I can escape being behind him. So after going about five blocks or six or so, we’re now back up to 40 miles an hour plus all of a sudden the same voice. That’s not really a voice. It’s annoying. That said, do those lessons back there now says start to slow down. Put several very specific, put several car lengths between you and that truck because that washing machine on the back of that truck is going to fall off, so I do, as I’m told, I start to slow down several car lengths of the people behind me. I’m sure I know because I don’t know why I’m starting to slow down in this busy traffic. Sure enough, soon as I’m back a safe dIstance that washing machine falls off the back of that truck, crashes to the ground and bounces. We ever saw a washing machine bounce when it gets so hard. If I had not listened, I would have been close enough. Either the washing machine would have fallen on my car or I would have been close enough to it because he screeching rapes. The minute it happened, it could have been fatal. It could have been awful. It could have been a terrible situation if I had been a normal car length behind this truck. So listening to your guidance is a very smart thing to do.

Maria Felipe:                        39:13                       Thank you so much carl. This has been so helpful. It has been so helpful and I know a lot of course students and also people that are looking into a course to see what it’s about are going to get a lot out of this video. I wanted you to share quickly a couple terms that I’m going to say. I’m going to ask you about. Let me know what each one is very briefly, so it’s going to be kind of like a fun little little quiz. So the first thing is what is the ego based on the course of miracles? In a few words,

Carol Howe:                          39:45                       the ego is a collection of programming in our own brain, so it’s a collection of unexamined notions that we think are the truth and they’re not. What is the holy spirit? The holy spirit is the. You can call it your, your, your guidance, your intuition, the sense of I am right now. You can say, I am myself. I recognize myself. Isn’t that true? don’t you exist right now? You’re aware of existing. You’re aware of being alive right now. Okay. That sense of being you, did you recognize it was the same knew that you were yesterday when you woke up. Everything’s different in the in the world of form, but the I am this where you can say, I recognize myself as myself. Is that the same yesterday, the true self. You’re saying you’re the only. The only thing that, in other words, there’s only the self.

Carol Howe:                          40:46                       In other words, the bunch of programming that we call the ego is only that. It’s a bunch of programming, but every one of us recognize ourselves as ourselves. We never stopped to think about this the same self yesterday when you were 10 years old. We recognIze the I am this of ourselves, the presence. You can call that the holy spirit. The presence of us is what we are. The presence in this moment with that you are and that is costless. You have no beginning. You have no end. This is the most amazing thing that nobody ever pays any attention to. We actually exist affordable for no reason. There’s no. There’s no pause. If there were a pause that preceded us, that would somehow be more than us and it doesn’t exist. So it’s like, wow, you know, and it definitely feels good. It feels wonderful and the more we can go in this moment, I exist in this existence that I am you safe.

Carol Howe:                          41:58                       It’s peaceful, it’s loving. Joy is built into it. This is my inheritance. It’s what I am. And the whole purpose of the undoing of the ego is really the unlearning of these false beliefs about myself. Like I know good. I’m only the person. I’m. Nobody’s going to like me if they know who I really am. that’s what I call flatter thinking. In other words, just like the hypothesis is wrong, like the hypothesis was wrong in the 13th century when people said you’re going to fall off the edge of the earth if you go out there and dragons will get you if you fall off. The edge. Things that they allowed themselves to do was based on a hypothesis that was just plain false and we’ve lIved our lives on a hypothesis that’s just false and it’s the undoing of the false hood that this forces for.

Carol Howe:                          42:52                       That’s beautIful. What is forgiveness? Forgiveness is letting go of the grievances and the noise in our own minds. Forgiveness has nothing to do with anything else. It’s not, pardon me, it’s not you did this thing and I’m hurt, but I’m better than you are, so I’m going to get over it. It’s letting you see the thoughts in our minds about what I’m pushing against. What I think I have to have in order to be happy are all those grievances, all the noise in the mind, the blocks to the to the awareness of what’s involved in the silence in our minds. So forgiveness is letting go of the noise in your own mind, specifically the grievances because most of them, most of the noises about grievance and what is a miracle, a miracle is that shifting in the way we experience things. That allows us to be aware of the presence of love, which is the only thing that’s here, in other words, so it’s another way of saying what happens as I let go of the noise and the blocks and the thinking, thinking, thinking in my own mind.

Carol Howe:                          44:06                       It’s a law. It’s a way of being in the world that allows me to know with certainty that love is all there. That’s beautiful apparel end to end. I usually ask my guest, how do you live? You’re happy feral. Oh, well, I think I said that in the very beginning. I lived my happy by first of all knowing no matter how much I have, I fall off my horse someplace in any moment I start all over again. The past and future do not exist only right? This moment exists right here is where happiness is. Stay present, be helpful, love what you do and what can I say?

Maria Felipe:                        44:48                       I love it, carol. Well, I’m happy that we are both happy. Train together

Carol Howe:                          44:54                       for some reason. Somebody is coming in my house. Oh dear. One of those little kids who’s now grown is coming in my house. So in any event, I do want to let people know that we have wonderful online courses at one is see how I grew up, which is the dvds you’ve got are a big online course with all all. I’m so rather than physical dvds, they’re an online course with a very extensive workbook and if you want to get a headstart for practicing the course, this is it. It’s got animations, it’s got great big teaching props that really make the major points clearer than you’ve ever seen them before. And also last year I filmed an online program with jerry, jim polsky and his wife diane. He was the founder of attitudinal healing. We’ve been friends for 40 years, so jerry and diane and I created a great attitudinal piece. It’s the only time they have ever filmed anything like this, so you’ll certainly want to pay attention to that as well.

Maria Felipe:                        46:05                       Well, we’re definitely going to be paying attention to you hot stuff because you’re. And if you have a real difference

Carol Howe:                          46:12                       called you there with that baby, you call me. I’ll give you lots of my hard one advice.

Maria Felipe:                        46:17                       I’m going to take them to take you up on that and we’ll definitely share all the wonderful tools that you have. Your website is carol, how that’s how e.com. We’re going to be sharing them with our audience and thank you so much for sharing your lights and for bringing. I’m just this whole message of a course in miracles. It’s such a practical way. You are very inspiring and, and we love you. You’re such a light. So next time,

Carol Howe:                          46:47                       dear. Alrighty. Love you.